Greed - is the inordinate desire to possess wealth, goods, or objects of abstract value with the intention to keep it for one's self, far beyond the dictates of basic survival and comfort. It is applied to a markedly high desire for and pursuit of wealth, status, and power.
What a powerful word...What a horrible way to live...and family seems to be the worst culprit. Greed destroy's family's, tares them apart, and pits one against another. Why do people have the desire to be in control of everything? Why do people feel the need to hurt others through greed?
Our family, once was a tight knit unit. Sunday dinners at my grandmothers and hours playing with my cousins in the basement. I have so many fond memories of my childhood at my grandmothers. The fireplace stoked by my grandfather. Us 7 kids, hopping around on our bouncy balls. We would do this every Sunday. When we would leave, my grandmother would hand out a pack of gum to each of us. Oh, the good old days. Now our family is in pieces, torn apart by greed and the desire to control it all.
Without going into detail, possessions have somehow overshadowed what is important. Possessions that belong to no one but my grandmother. As my grandmother is laying in Long Term Care, her family, at the moment, is ripping her house apart. Fighting over who gets what and when. One has all the power and the other has nothing...not even a key to enter the house. Who does this? She is still alive! When has it gone to far?
I can't imagine what if feels like for my grandmother laying in her little corner in Long Term Care. I have talked to her a few times today and she is so depressed. She knows she will never go home. She knows her house is being taken apart, she knows this is how she is going to live the remainder of her life. See, her house needs to be sold to pay for her care. So the contents must be dispersed. My grandmother has allotted who gets what...but that does not stop the greed. Why would something think they should get something over someone else? Obviously, my grandmother has taken the time to chose who she wants her possessions to go to. But should this not be done after she is gone? It seems so cruel and so heartless to fight over a living person's things.
There are some things that would mean a great deal to me, but only if she wanted me to have them. Like her Scategories game. My cousin Allison and I, used to play this game with Nana for hours. We would laugh at the craziness. We would eat popcorn, play the game, and just have fun. That is how I want to remember my grandmother.
My family has taught me something very valuable. There are some people I NEVER want to be like. I will never, under any circumstances pit my children against each other. I will NEVER let greed control me. I will NEVER fight for something that I have no right to. I have seem my family torn apart over the stupidest thing. I have witnessed horrible words, actions, and events unfold before death has even occurred. I think it is time for people to grow up and to remember what is important. That someday soon, the Matriarch of our family will be gone. There will not be anymore phone calls, visits or memories to be made. We will only live on the memories we have left, and I refuse to have them be soured by greed.
I wish certain family members would grow up and cherish the time left with Nana. Possessions are just possessions, my grandmother is a LIFE!
Hating family dynamics in Pickford,
Shelby
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Mom to 3 Boys...
Awww, the sweet sound of boys playing...The laughter, the camaraderie, the love between brothers! Yeah right! Not around here! We have, "That is my Beyblade, or Mom, Colt is ruining my Lego tower." But when there is silence, you know something is WRONG!
The other day, I decided to straighten up and clean out the boys room. I had bought some bins to put their toys in. While I was hard at work, I hear nothing...silence...followed by the sound of Kade saying "Mom, you better get in here!" "What Kade?" "Umm, Colt and Blake dumped a whole container of salt into the gallon of milk!" "WHAT?" "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" This is my life...this is what it is like to raise boys! This is a WHOLE new world to me.
See, I grew up with 2 sisters. At no point did we ever think of doing these crazy antics. We would play house, braid Aubree's hair, or play outside peacefully. We would fight...we would argue, but we did not do the crazy things my boys have done. The "milk" incident is one of many that have occurred at my house. I distinctly remember Kade as a 4 year old, whom was fully potty trained standing on top of my end table watering my carpet! I said, "Kade, why did you do that?" His response; "I wanted to see how far I could make it go!"
Another time, the boys decided to take my can goods out of the cabinet. They proceeded to roll them down the stairs, only after they took the labels off of them. When I find this out, I am shocked to see about 10-12 cans, labels off, at the bottom of my basement steps. Who the heck knows what is in the cans anymore? For a long time after, it was a guessing game as to what was in the cans. Is it corn? Peas? or Cream of Mushroom Soup?
Events like these, make me want to pull my hair out! They make me want to run and hide...many times I question what I am doing wrong? Am I not watching them closely enough? Am I letting them get away with to much? When it comes down to it, no I am not! I can't control everything. I cant prevent all events...But, I can let them be boys!
I have never been one to get all fired up about things like getting dirty, changing their clothes 100 times because they decided to jump in mud puddles, or watching them ride their skateboards down a hill into a pile of sand. What is the point? If they are dirty, they are happy. If they are wet, it means they explored. If they rode into a pile of sand; they have made a memory! These are the things they will remember. They are the events that mean the most! Holes in jeans, dirt of face, sand in shoes...means life is good!
Raising boys is so much harder than I ever expected. It really challenges you as a parent. Obviously, as a girl, I do not understand their thinking. I do not relate to them at all. But it is days like this morning that get me through. I woke up to Blake saying, "Stay in bed Mom, we have a surprise for you."
My rowdy boys took the time to make me breakfast in bed! 4 pieces of cold, buttered toast, a peanut butter and jelly, and cold coffee! How could this not warm your heart? How could you be mad about the gallon of milk getting ruined? Because at the end of the day, they are my life. They are my happiness, they are what gets me up every morning to messes I can't control. I am so blessed to have them in my life, blessed that call ME Mom!
Looking forward to another hectic day in Pickford,
Shelby
The other day, I decided to straighten up and clean out the boys room. I had bought some bins to put their toys in. While I was hard at work, I hear nothing...silence...followed by the sound of Kade saying "Mom, you better get in here!" "What Kade?" "Umm, Colt and Blake dumped a whole container of salt into the gallon of milk!" "WHAT?" "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" This is my life...this is what it is like to raise boys! This is a WHOLE new world to me.
See, I grew up with 2 sisters. At no point did we ever think of doing these crazy antics. We would play house, braid Aubree's hair, or play outside peacefully. We would fight...we would argue, but we did not do the crazy things my boys have done. The "milk" incident is one of many that have occurred at my house. I distinctly remember Kade as a 4 year old, whom was fully potty trained standing on top of my end table watering my carpet! I said, "Kade, why did you do that?" His response; "I wanted to see how far I could make it go!"
Another time, the boys decided to take my can goods out of the cabinet. They proceeded to roll them down the stairs, only after they took the labels off of them. When I find this out, I am shocked to see about 10-12 cans, labels off, at the bottom of my basement steps. Who the heck knows what is in the cans anymore? For a long time after, it was a guessing game as to what was in the cans. Is it corn? Peas? or Cream of Mushroom Soup?
Events like these, make me want to pull my hair out! They make me want to run and hide...many times I question what I am doing wrong? Am I not watching them closely enough? Am I letting them get away with to much? When it comes down to it, no I am not! I can't control everything. I cant prevent all events...But, I can let them be boys!
I have never been one to get all fired up about things like getting dirty, changing their clothes 100 times because they decided to jump in mud puddles, or watching them ride their skateboards down a hill into a pile of sand. What is the point? If they are dirty, they are happy. If they are wet, it means they explored. If they rode into a pile of sand; they have made a memory! These are the things they will remember. They are the events that mean the most! Holes in jeans, dirt of face, sand in shoes...means life is good!
My rowdy boys took the time to make me breakfast in bed! 4 pieces of cold, buttered toast, a peanut butter and jelly, and cold coffee! How could this not warm your heart? How could you be mad about the gallon of milk getting ruined? Because at the end of the day, they are my life. They are my happiness, they are what gets me up every morning to messes I can't control. I am so blessed to have them in my life, blessed that call ME Mom!
Looking forward to another hectic day in Pickford,
Shelby
Monday, March 26, 2012
The End of Life....
I remember laying in bed as a child, thinking about death. It seemed so far away. So in the future, and something I would not have to worry about for years and years. I remember thinking of what it would be like after my mom was gone, and it scared me to death. But again, why worry now? Right?
Well, it has been years, and now I am facing the reality of my maternal grandmother health is failing, and it is failing fast. See, my Nana has always been one of high energy. This year she turned 87, and she has always been very active. Walking her dog around the neighborhood, running to the grocery store, going out to eat, planning her class reunion, and keeping busy with her yard work. But that has all come to an end. At the end of September, Nana took a fall that has changed her life. In that short period of time, she has gone from complete independence, to living in Long Term Care at the hospital.
She had two falls. One outside and one in the bathtub. She never told anyone about the falls. It was not until her leg started to ache that she disclosed what actually happened. They did all the tests that were possible and they never found the source of the pain, but she could not even stand on it. She was in and out of the hospital for months, and even a relative took her on, but it was to much for one person. The decision was made to put her in Long Term Care where she will reside for the remainder of her life.
This is beyond heartbreaking to watch. Last night, Larry and I went to visit her. She shares a room with 3 other ladies. She greeted us with a huge smile and introduced us to her roommates. She was sitting on her bed eating a carrot, which is one of her favorite foods. Larry sat on the chair and I sat on her bed. Thus, began our visit. At first I was taken back by how frail she was. I was surprised when she told me that she no longer desires to go down to the dining hall to eat, she prefers to eat in her room. She told us that she does not want to participate in BINGO, or any other games or activities provided. She wants to sit in her little corner and just be! How could someone so social not want to socialize? Where did my Nana go? And, I want her back!
As we were talking, I looked at Larry. He was in deep conversation with Nana. My mind drifted to thoughts of...this could be me someday. Someday, Larry may not be here and I will be alone in this type of environment. My eyes filled with tears. I can't imagine not having him around everyday. I can't imagine saying goodbye to him. But reality is, that someday that could happen. Why is it that we have to endure this type of pain? Why can't people die together? Why does the end of life have to be so cruel?
Nana said she has had to make some very hard decisions. Like putting her house up for sale that she has lived in since she was first married almost 70 years ago. And also coming to the realization that she won't ever live there again, surrounded by the things that mean the most to her. Instead, she will live out the remaining years in a little corner with a small tv and a serving tray. This literally breaks my heart.
During our visit, Nana said that she has to accept this way of life because now it is time for someone to take care of her. And she is right. She can't live alone and she needs to be safe. Plus, she has spent her whole life taking care of everyone else. This is so true. I am amazed at how people are so eager to take care of a new baby but yet so reluctant to take care of the elderly. Are they really not one in the same? Both need love, nurturing, daily care, and most of all attention. They need human contact and to know they are loved. They need guidance, support and to know they matter, to know they worthy, to know their life meant something.
For now, I will continue to visit Nana and in hopes I always get just "one more visit." I promise not to ignore her, and tell her everyday how much I love her and appreciate her. Because at some point, I will never get this chance again. I want her to know just what she meant to me and how much I have cherished every second I have had with her. I promise to make her "End of Life" a good one.
With a sad heart in Pickford,
Shelby
Well, it has been years, and now I am facing the reality of my maternal grandmother health is failing, and it is failing fast. See, my Nana has always been one of high energy. This year she turned 87, and she has always been very active. Walking her dog around the neighborhood, running to the grocery store, going out to eat, planning her class reunion, and keeping busy with her yard work. But that has all come to an end. At the end of September, Nana took a fall that has changed her life. In that short period of time, she has gone from complete independence, to living in Long Term Care at the hospital.
She had two falls. One outside and one in the bathtub. She never told anyone about the falls. It was not until her leg started to ache that she disclosed what actually happened. They did all the tests that were possible and they never found the source of the pain, but she could not even stand on it. She was in and out of the hospital for months, and even a relative took her on, but it was to much for one person. The decision was made to put her in Long Term Care where she will reside for the remainder of her life.
This is beyond heartbreaking to watch. Last night, Larry and I went to visit her. She shares a room with 3 other ladies. She greeted us with a huge smile and introduced us to her roommates. She was sitting on her bed eating a carrot, which is one of her favorite foods. Larry sat on the chair and I sat on her bed. Thus, began our visit. At first I was taken back by how frail she was. I was surprised when she told me that she no longer desires to go down to the dining hall to eat, she prefers to eat in her room. She told us that she does not want to participate in BINGO, or any other games or activities provided. She wants to sit in her little corner and just be! How could someone so social not want to socialize? Where did my Nana go? And, I want her back!
As we were talking, I looked at Larry. He was in deep conversation with Nana. My mind drifted to thoughts of...this could be me someday. Someday, Larry may not be here and I will be alone in this type of environment. My eyes filled with tears. I can't imagine not having him around everyday. I can't imagine saying goodbye to him. But reality is, that someday that could happen. Why is it that we have to endure this type of pain? Why can't people die together? Why does the end of life have to be so cruel?
Nana said she has had to make some very hard decisions. Like putting her house up for sale that she has lived in since she was first married almost 70 years ago. And also coming to the realization that she won't ever live there again, surrounded by the things that mean the most to her. Instead, she will live out the remaining years in a little corner with a small tv and a serving tray. This literally breaks my heart.
During our visit, Nana said that she has to accept this way of life because now it is time for someone to take care of her. And she is right. She can't live alone and she needs to be safe. Plus, she has spent her whole life taking care of everyone else. This is so true. I am amazed at how people are so eager to take care of a new baby but yet so reluctant to take care of the elderly. Are they really not one in the same? Both need love, nurturing, daily care, and most of all attention. They need human contact and to know they are loved. They need guidance, support and to know they matter, to know they worthy, to know their life meant something.
For now, I will continue to visit Nana and in hopes I always get just "one more visit." I promise not to ignore her, and tell her everyday how much I love her and appreciate her. Because at some point, I will never get this chance again. I want her to know just what she meant to me and how much I have cherished every second I have had with her. I promise to make her "End of Life" a good one.
With a sad heart in Pickford,
Shelby
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Things I AM!
I had a post a long time ago titled "Things I am NOT" so I thought I should follow that up with the things I AM..
1. I am a good listener - I really love to listen to my friends talk. I try hard to give them helpful advice. I think this is one reason one of my passions is to be a counselor. One of these days I will go back for my Master's Degree in counseling.
2. I am a good cook and baker - This has been a passion of mine since I was a little girl. I love to have treats for my family and I love to try new things...now, they may not always be good, but I sure do try.
3. I am the peace maker of the family - I have always been the one who wants to keep and make every one happy. Many times it is at my expense... I have learned, in the past few years, to be better at trying to make myself happy before trying to make others. But it is a hard habit to break!
4. I am a Breastfeeding and Preemie Parenting advocate - Breastfeeding is something I feel very passionate about. I did not breastfeed Kade, due to having NO support from my family. I regret that decision more than anything else. When Blake was born premature, I could have cared less what my family thought about breastfeeding...best decision I ever made :) I feel very strongly about it...Also, when Blake was in the NICU, I had no one to talk to who had been in my situation. This was very hard for me. I would love to talk to other mothers struggling during their NICU time...but since we don't have a NICU up here, I have to do it online....
5. I am a very social person - Anyone who knows me, knows this is true. I think I could talk to a brick wall if I had to. I am happiest when I am socializing with friends and family. I love a good conversation and I am rarely at a loss for words :)
6. I am very forgetful - Holy Cow...what has happened to my brain? I think I would forget my head if it was not attached. I am forgetful and I lose everything! It is quite rediculous....
7. I am very self-consious - I hate this about me. I wish I could be happy in my skin, but I have always been plagued by my low self-esteem...mainly with weight issues...
8. I am a person who can get by with very little sleep - I have always been this way. Even in college, I would stay up really late and get up early for work. I can function just fine on very few hours of sleep...I guess that is one of the reasons I am a decent Mom...
9. I am a home body. I love to be home with my family. Many times my mom will ask me to go to the movies with her. Honestly, I would rather stay home with my husband and kids. I hate driving the long 24 mile drive to Pickford at night and you will never catch me out and about when it is snowing. Some people think I am boring. I think I like safety and routines.
10. I am an organizational nightmare! I am not kidding...I try so hard and it always goes back to things falling out of my cabinets. I feel sorry for Larry. See, he is an Engineer. He is percise, everything has a spot, and he is very organized. He has had to learn to live with me...and I feel bad. I try so hard, but it overwhelms me so much that I run from it. This year, I have devoted my life to organizing:) Stay tuned for progress notes on this subject!
So, these are just a few of the things I am! If you know me, and I am forgetting something (refer back to #6) please feel free to leave a comment about it...I would love others perspectives of me!
Until Next Time,
Shelby
2. I am a good cook and baker - This has been a passion of mine since I was a little girl. I love to have treats for my family and I love to try new things...now, they may not always be good, but I sure do try.
3. I am the peace maker of the family - I have always been the one who wants to keep and make every one happy. Many times it is at my expense... I have learned, in the past few years, to be better at trying to make myself happy before trying to make others. But it is a hard habit to break!
4. I am a Breastfeeding and Preemie Parenting advocate - Breastfeeding is something I feel very passionate about. I did not breastfeed Kade, due to having NO support from my family. I regret that decision more than anything else. When Blake was born premature, I could have cared less what my family thought about breastfeeding...best decision I ever made :) I feel very strongly about it...Also, when Blake was in the NICU, I had no one to talk to who had been in my situation. This was very hard for me. I would love to talk to other mothers struggling during their NICU time...but since we don't have a NICU up here, I have to do it online....
5. I am a very social person - Anyone who knows me, knows this is true. I think I could talk to a brick wall if I had to. I am happiest when I am socializing with friends and family. I love a good conversation and I am rarely at a loss for words :)
6. I am very forgetful - Holy Cow...what has happened to my brain? I think I would forget my head if it was not attached. I am forgetful and I lose everything! It is quite rediculous....
7. I am very self-consious - I hate this about me. I wish I could be happy in my skin, but I have always been plagued by my low self-esteem...mainly with weight issues...
8. I am a person who can get by with very little sleep - I have always been this way. Even in college, I would stay up really late and get up early for work. I can function just fine on very few hours of sleep...I guess that is one of the reasons I am a decent Mom...
9. I am a home body. I love to be home with my family. Many times my mom will ask me to go to the movies with her. Honestly, I would rather stay home with my husband and kids. I hate driving the long 24 mile drive to Pickford at night and you will never catch me out and about when it is snowing. Some people think I am boring. I think I like safety and routines.
10. I am an organizational nightmare! I am not kidding...I try so hard and it always goes back to things falling out of my cabinets. I feel sorry for Larry. See, he is an Engineer. He is percise, everything has a spot, and he is very organized. He has had to learn to live with me...and I feel bad. I try so hard, but it overwhelms me so much that I run from it. This year, I have devoted my life to organizing:) Stay tuned for progress notes on this subject!
So, these are just a few of the things I am! If you know me, and I am forgetting something (refer back to #6) please feel free to leave a comment about it...I would love others perspectives of me!
Until Next Time,
Shelby
Its the Simple Things....
Because, we live in a small little house that used to be a log home. There are 6 of us in a 3 bedroom house. I have a problem with organization. I have tried, and I stink at it :) But, I have decided that I am going to get it together and organize my life. I started painting, with the help of my amazing friend, Tawni, We painted the "log" room (where the cubbies will reside) the entryway and my bathroom...My cubbies will contain 6 lockers with a spot for a wicker basket on top. The bottom will be for shoes...Then I am going to stain it and polyurethane them to a high shine gloss! This is a dream come true!
See, it s the small things in life that make it so much better. Its the little things that will make my life easier that has me so excited. Larry thinks I'm crazy for being so wrapped up in these cubbies. But I can't take the mittens, boots, coats, backpacks, scarves, and snow pants thrown in the "log" room. I have put hooks up and they don't get used. I have put a huge wicker basket for mittens, hats, and scarves in there...guess what? That does not get used. I am fed up with cutter, laziness and messes! Thus, the shear joy and excitement for my cubbies!
Everyday after school, the boys come ripping into the house and throw their things where ever they may land. Not anymore! As soon as the cubbies are done...new rules, new habits, a new way of life! Yes, this sketch is going to change my life... I can hardly wait!
Excited in Pickford,
Shelby :)
Friday, March 23, 2012
Being a Stay At Home Mom....
Growing up I wanted to do many things. I wanted to be a Model, an Actress, a Hair Dresser, a Flight Attendant, Orthodontist, and even Miss America. Never once did I tell myself I wanted to be a Stay At Home Mom. I remember when I was young, my mom would take me to dance lessons over in Canada. One time we were talking about what I wanted to be when I grow up. I remember, as we were crossing the bridge, I told her I wanted to do something great with my life. I wanted to make something of myself, and I wanted to be successfull. I never wanted to struggle for money. I wanted a huge house, and I wanted to be independent. This goal came from watching my mom raise us girls by herself. I just never wanted to find myself in that same position.
I don't know what would have been easier, picking one of these career choices or becoming a Stay at Home Mom? I can't imagine anything being harder than the job I have. When Kade was 5 months old, we moved back to the Soo after being gone for 6 years. I remember, we were driving back from Detour, we had just got our taxes done, and I told Larry I could not imagine leaving Kade to go to work. The feeling actually made me sick. I was scared to let my baby be in the care of anyone but me. At that moment, we decided that no matter how much money Larry was making, I would stay home. We would find way and it may be hard for a while, but we were going to make it work.
It was hard at first getting used to not having to be somewhere. I had finished up my student teaching, and life with no homework was amazing. I found myself really enjoying the alone time with Kade. I loved watching him grow and change . I loved being the one he depended on, and the one who got to witness his first time rolling over, first foods, and the first steps he took. It was weird being able to just do what we wanted and not being on a schedule. I was so happy, I wanted to have another baby right away.
We bought our house in Pickford in October of 2003. I was pregnant with Blake and we were settling into life as a Stay at Home Mom...When Blake was born 10 weeks early, that is when the reality set in that I would be not only responsible for Kade, but also a premature baby boy! The thought of being alone with him was terrifying, but I knew that I could do it. I had spent 6 weeks with Blake in the NICU, I knew all the special things that he needed, and I was confident because I just wanted him home. Things of course fell into place. my routine become apparent and my former life of wanting to be a teacher was gone. I was now, completely, 100%, a SAHM!
There are many days, even know, that I think to myself..."I wonder what I would be teaching?" or "I wonder how our lives would be different with two incomes?" But as I reflect on this, it does not matter. You see, I have devoted my life to being here for my kids. I have devoted my life to laundry, cleaning the toilet, wiping up messes, tripping over shoes, stepping on Lego's, vacuuming the floor, sweeping up sand, bathing the kids, scrubbing the tub, making snacks and dinner...the list goes on and on! As I think about what "could of been" I am blessed by "what actually is." No amount of money could make me happier. No amount of money could change the joy I have felt for the last 9 years. See, my degree has not gone to waste because I am a teacher. I may not teach other peoples children, I teach my own, everyday! There is no greater job or joy, than that of a SAHM!
So, for the many days I feel overwhelmed, broken, unappreciated, and tired, I need to reflect on the joy in my life. I need to appreciate the wonderful blessing I have. My husband has a good job that allows me to be with my children. I have 4 wonderfully, healthy, vibrant, children, who make my world rotate. I have family and friends who get me through the rough days, and I have an amazing husband who loves me! What more could one person want? Well, how about........A NAP?
I don't know what would have been easier, picking one of these career choices or becoming a Stay at Home Mom? I can't imagine anything being harder than the job I have. When Kade was 5 months old, we moved back to the Soo after being gone for 6 years. I remember, we were driving back from Detour, we had just got our taxes done, and I told Larry I could not imagine leaving Kade to go to work. The feeling actually made me sick. I was scared to let my baby be in the care of anyone but me. At that moment, we decided that no matter how much money Larry was making, I would stay home. We would find way and it may be hard for a while, but we were going to make it work.
It was hard at first getting used to not having to be somewhere. I had finished up my student teaching, and life with no homework was amazing. I found myself really enjoying the alone time with Kade. I loved watching him grow and change . I loved being the one he depended on, and the one who got to witness his first time rolling over, first foods, and the first steps he took. It was weird being able to just do what we wanted and not being on a schedule. I was so happy, I wanted to have another baby right away.
We bought our house in Pickford in October of 2003. I was pregnant with Blake and we were settling into life as a Stay at Home Mom...When Blake was born 10 weeks early, that is when the reality set in that I would be not only responsible for Kade, but also a premature baby boy! The thought of being alone with him was terrifying, but I knew that I could do it. I had spent 6 weeks with Blake in the NICU, I knew all the special things that he needed, and I was confident because I just wanted him home. Things of course fell into place. my routine become apparent and my former life of wanting to be a teacher was gone. I was now, completely, 100%, a SAHM!
There are many days, even know, that I think to myself..."I wonder what I would be teaching?" or "I wonder how our lives would be different with two incomes?" But as I reflect on this, it does not matter. You see, I have devoted my life to being here for my kids. I have devoted my life to laundry, cleaning the toilet, wiping up messes, tripping over shoes, stepping on Lego's, vacuuming the floor, sweeping up sand, bathing the kids, scrubbing the tub, making snacks and dinner...the list goes on and on! As I think about what "could of been" I am blessed by "what actually is." No amount of money could make me happier. No amount of money could change the joy I have felt for the last 9 years. See, my degree has not gone to waste because I am a teacher. I may not teach other peoples children, I teach my own, everyday! There is no greater job or joy, than that of a SAHM!
So, for the many days I feel overwhelmed, broken, unappreciated, and tired, I need to reflect on the joy in my life. I need to appreciate the wonderful blessing I have. My husband has a good job that allows me to be with my children. I have 4 wonderfully, healthy, vibrant, children, who make my world rotate. I have family and friends who get me through the rough days, and I have an amazing husband who loves me! What more could one person want? Well, how about........A NAP?
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Can't believe it has been almost a year!
Oh, how I have missed you! I can't believe it has been almost a year since I have wrote in my blog. But as a mom of 4, time just gets away from you. Many wonderful things happened to me this past year. My baby girl is now 17 months old and growing so fast. I just changed her closet over to 24 month clothes. Kinda breaks my heart, but I am so grateful for her and the joy she has brought to the family...
My boys are growing and thriving. Kade is doing great in the 3rd grade and getting ready for the science fair. Blake is loving the 1st grade and becoming a very good reader :) Then there is Colt! My 5 year old who has so much personality:) He is quite the comedian. This past year has been very busy and fun! I am so looking forward to summer vacation.
Larry and I celebrated our 14th anniversary this year. We went to a wonderful resort outside of Traverse City, Mi. It was quiet, quaint and just what we needed to reconnect. It is amazing how this weekend together really brings us back to the beginning and refreshes us for the upcoming year. We have made our anniversary a priority for 14 years now and I truly believe it is one of the reasons we still are in love after all these years. Time alone is so important...
This year sadness has made its way in also! My grandmother's health is failing and she is not doing well at all. She has always been a very vibrant lady. Walking her dog and running to the local casino for quarters, but that has all ended. She had to give her dog away and she is now living in the Long Term Care in our hospital. This is so hard to watch. It also amazes me at how taking care of an elderly person is not something anyone wants to do. It surprised me just how many other members of the family have let the responsibility fall on just a few. Now, I understand many live away and that is not what I am referring to...but we have many capable members in town who can't seem to even visit or call. Makes me so sad. I really don't know how much time I have left with my grandmother, but I know I plan on making it count!
This past year, I have also met some wonderful people. I met my friend, Ali. She really changed my life. She is one of those friends that you can't imagine not having and I often wonder what I did without her. Sadly, she has moved to Arkansas with her family for her husbands job. But we still have a very deep bond that is indescribable. I also have met a wonderful girl named Kristie. What an amazing person she is. I feel so blessed to have met her at a time when I was so lonely. These two women really have changed my life in the last year. Thank you to both of you for making my days shorter and for making me smile everyday!
More good news!!! Baby's, baby's, baby's everywhere! But not me!! My baby sister is having a baby girl in May! I am so excited! She sends me pictures daily of her belly. She also calls me with questions, which I feel so honored she comes to me. I can't wait to hold this little bundle. Also, one of my very best friends, Katrina is over-due to have her baby! This is so exciting for me. She has invited me to the birth. I have been present at one of her daughters birth about 4 years ago, and it was one of the most memorable days of my life. The miracle of birth is amazing. Katrina was at the birth of my Kloe, and I am beyond honored she has asked me to be there!
I am going to write more often. Writing about my days make me breathe easier. I hope you all will follow me as I continue to share my life's journey.
Much Love,
Shelby
My boys are growing and thriving. Kade is doing great in the 3rd grade and getting ready for the science fair. Blake is loving the 1st grade and becoming a very good reader :) Then there is Colt! My 5 year old who has so much personality:) He is quite the comedian. This past year has been very busy and fun! I am so looking forward to summer vacation.
Larry and I celebrated our 14th anniversary this year. We went to a wonderful resort outside of Traverse City, Mi. It was quiet, quaint and just what we needed to reconnect. It is amazing how this weekend together really brings us back to the beginning and refreshes us for the upcoming year. We have made our anniversary a priority for 14 years now and I truly believe it is one of the reasons we still are in love after all these years. Time alone is so important...
This year sadness has made its way in also! My grandmother's health is failing and she is not doing well at all. She has always been a very vibrant lady. Walking her dog and running to the local casino for quarters, but that has all ended. She had to give her dog away and she is now living in the Long Term Care in our hospital. This is so hard to watch. It also amazes me at how taking care of an elderly person is not something anyone wants to do. It surprised me just how many other members of the family have let the responsibility fall on just a few. Now, I understand many live away and that is not what I am referring to...but we have many capable members in town who can't seem to even visit or call. Makes me so sad. I really don't know how much time I have left with my grandmother, but I know I plan on making it count!
This past year, I have also met some wonderful people. I met my friend, Ali. She really changed my life. She is one of those friends that you can't imagine not having and I often wonder what I did without her. Sadly, she has moved to Arkansas with her family for her husbands job. But we still have a very deep bond that is indescribable. I also have met a wonderful girl named Kristie. What an amazing person she is. I feel so blessed to have met her at a time when I was so lonely. These two women really have changed my life in the last year. Thank you to both of you for making my days shorter and for making me smile everyday!
More good news!!! Baby's, baby's, baby's everywhere! But not me!! My baby sister is having a baby girl in May! I am so excited! She sends me pictures daily of her belly. She also calls me with questions, which I feel so honored she comes to me. I can't wait to hold this little bundle. Also, one of my very best friends, Katrina is over-due to have her baby! This is so exciting for me. She has invited me to the birth. I have been present at one of her daughters birth about 4 years ago, and it was one of the most memorable days of my life. The miracle of birth is amazing. Katrina was at the birth of my Kloe, and I am beyond honored she has asked me to be there!
I am going to write more often. Writing about my days make me breathe easier. I hope you all will follow me as I continue to share my life's journey.
Much Love,
Shelby
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